moments in slow motion
by czqy
Summary: Hajime thinks about only how bad moments seem to happen in slow motion, then learns how wrong he is. /HQ 367 SPOILERS/


"Bakakawa," Hajime huffs, catching his breath, having finally caught up to his best friend. "What're you running so hard for? What, is somethi—"

He cuts himself off once he sees Oikawa's screen, and like him, freezes in place.

Hajime knows how fast-paced volleyball is. He knows that in the blink of an eye, anything can happen. A spike can be hit; a block can be made; a ball can be received. Worst of all, though, is that a point can be lost.

But here's the thing.

Quite often it doesn't feel like that. Like a second.

In moments like these, and _especially_ during the match point rally, during the _final_ set of the game, everything happens in slow motion.

Hajime is not in Tokyo right now.

He is not playing in the national high school volleyball championships.

He is not on Karasuno's team.

And yet, as he watches that ball strike off the libero's arm, as he watches it approach the ground, as he watches the players in the back row fruitlessly dive for it, and then finally, as he watches that volleyball hit the ground, then bounce once, twice, thrice… It is all so drawn out.

As are the reactions.

There's always this delay, between the final point and the players, the crowd.

Hajime has subconsciously stepped closer to Oikawa, to get a better look at the broadcast, to better gauge the expressions.

For Kamomedai's side it's waiting. Hesitance. The beginning signs of elation.

For Karasuno's side it's disbelief. Shock. Denial maybe, even.

And the thing about everything moving in slow motion is that you catch the little things. So when the camera zooms in on one of Karasuno's third years, even though it pans away immediately, the image gets seared into Hajime's mind.

His face is scrunched and his eyebrows are furrowed. It's subtle, but his lips are trembling. And, most obvious, his eyes are beginning to well up with tears.

Hajime looks away.

He feels like an eternity has passed during those mere seconds, and he knows it's been just that because the people who were in front of him before are barely a few metres closer now.

Man, maybe he should reconsider playing volleyball during university. He feels like he ages every time he plays or watches a match.

He hopes the third years are going to be okay.

He's never lost a quarter-final match during nationals, and despite how it sounds maybe he's bitter about that, maybe he'll always be, but he knows what it's like.

To have a loss constitute your last game of the year. To have a loss close up your high school volleyball career.

Aoba Johsai lost to Karasuno at the representative playoffs, after all.

Unlike what comes beforehand, _that_ is immediate.

The loss.

Within an instant, everything ends. Your time on the court; your team; your journey.

There's nothing being drawn out then. Nothing to let you savour one last moment, have one more touch, make one final call.

It's all taken away, just like that.

"I thought I would feel gratified, or relieved, or something," comes Oikawa's voice. It's the first time either of them have spoken since that last play.

"Shittykawa," Hajime tries to say. His voice trails off when Oikawa continues his sentence.

"But I don't."

He turns and faces Hajime then, and Hajime is met with what he likes to call Oikawa-sama, and not in a sarcastic or joking manner. Oikawa is simply just looking at him, yet Hajime feels an overwhelming sensation, making him want to buckle at the knees.

It's something about his appearance. The warm brown of his hair, which seems poof and fluff at all the right places, and that one section which always falls in front of his eyes no matter how hard he tries to keep it in place. The warm brown of his eyes, which are still wide, but from something other than shock. Vulnerability, maybe. Rawness. And his open expression, his mouth drawn in a thin neutral line, his figure dressed in running gear. Hajime has on a similar getup, loose jacket and shorts paired with form-fitting tights, but the way he looks in them is just different.

The way Oikawa is standing, body angled slightly away from Hajime, his arms by his side, phone still in hand, with the grey sky and bare trees behind him, just hits different.

Tooru is beautiful.

And Hajime has to look away, because even the crisp cold air isn't helping his cheeks, which have started to burn hot.

"Maybe you're more of a decent person than I thought," he mumbles. Insults come easily to him. Insulting _Oikawa_ comes easily. Dealing with his feelings for his teammate-setter-captain-partner, though? Hajime would rather not.

"Oh, Iwa-chan, come on!"

And there's Brattykawa. This Oikawa is easier to face. He doesn't make Hajime blush.

"But really. I thought that maybe if Karasuno lost I would feel some vindication, that they haven't defeated us at all, that we can still win against them, but I don't feel like that. Why don't I feel like that?"

It takes Hajime a moment to register that Oikawa is directing this at _him_.

"What? You're asking _me_?"

"If I don't know, surely you would."

"What kind of logic is that, dumbass?"

"It's not logic, it's just how it is. You know me better than anyone. Probably even myself."

Hajime… doesn't know what to say to that. The thing is, Oikawa isn't wrong. From the time they first met up until now, there's no one else Oikawa has been with as long as Hajime. It doesn't even come close. Every year they grew older, each new school year they entered, it was with the other by their side.

Except this year.

For the first time ever, they won't be together. They're going to different universities. They'll meet different people. They might grow apart.

Hajime shakes his head clear of the thoughts that have been plaguing his mind since the night of their last ever game playing on the same side of the court. It's not the time for that right now. He should be making the most of what he has left with Oikawa, not fear what he won't.

Oikawa must notice his grim expression, because he frowns, and dare Hajime say, actually looks a bit worried.

"Ah! Never mind, Iwa-chan. I don't want to strain your brain, making you think so hard."

And any anxiety Hajime had inside him is gone. He glares at Oikawa whilst asking himself how he could've fallen for such an idiot.

He stalks towards the boy, intending to smack some sense into him, but is startled when Oikawa suddenly starts running again, presumably to get away from him. Hajime needs a moment to recover, before he growls and starts giving chase.

Eventually, Hajime catches up to Oikawa. Or rather, Hajime reaches Oikawa, where he has stopped and is staring at a tree.

Hajime slows his pace and jogs to stand beside him. Oikawa is silent, so Hajime doesn't talk either, just looks in the same direction as Oikawa, even though he doesn't know why.

"It's the tree where you used to catch a lot of cicadas."

"Huh?"

"This tree. There would always be cicadas here. Whenever you went on one of your 'hunts' and found this tree, you'd be so happy."

"Oh…"

Frankly, Hajime hadn't remembered that. He certainly never remembered any specific trees brimming with the insect, otherwise he wouldn't have had to spend so long searching for them. He's surprised Oikawa noticed the same tree had many cicadas each time but never told him.

Actually, he's not. It's a very Oikawa thing to do.

"I never told you because you were having so much fun searching." Hajime turns to look at Oikawa. Why does it seem like he can read his mind? "You were so energetic, running so hard despite the heat, I couldn't just spoil that. Besides, if you were able to find so many cicadas at the start, it'd cut our time together short. And," Oikawa faces Hajime, gazing intently into his eyes, "that's the last thing I want."

"What…" Hajime's throat closes up. His heart starts beating faster. He feels like there's something significant in Oikawa's words, but he's scared to put the pieces together. Doesn't want to jump to the wrong conclusion. He swallows, then tries again. "What do you mean?"

Oikawa's eyes soften, and he regards Hajime with this expression he has never seen before, one that is so genuinely fond. Then, in what feels like slow motion, Hajime watches as Oikawa brings his hand up, and feels it settle on his cheek. Every neuron in Hajime's body picks up on the touch, on the warmth seeping through his gloved hand, on the affection he still has in his eyes. There's an abundance of signals being sent throughout Hajime's body, and he's overwhelmed by the sensation.

"Iwa-chan. Iwaizumi. Hajime."

Hajime sucks in a deep breath. He has never heard his first name come from Oikawa's mouth before, and he has _never _heard it uttered with such tenderness. He feels like he is going to explode at any moment now.

"I've thought a lot about what you said a few months ago… About teams changing and us competing and your declaration that you'll take me down. And especially about me being the partner you can boast about, and how that won't change regardless of everything else happening around us. And I…"

Oikawa is nervous. Hajime hadn't noticed this before, too preoccupied by how _he_ was feeling, but it's so obvious now. The smile on his face doesn't quite reach his eyes, and he's talking slower than normal, as if deliberating every word before saying it out loud. His voice is a bit shaky too, and there's a hesitance Hajime doesn't think he's ever seen Oikawa exhibit before.

Then, he takes a deep breath, and once he opens his eyes, his demeanour changes. He becomes completely serious, there's no grin playing on his lips, and he speaks with confidence.

"I don't want to be apart from you. Any more than I have to, anyway. So… Come to Tokyo with me."

Hajime's eyes widen, he involuntary jerks back. He doesn't mean anything negative by it, it's just his instinctual reaction, and he's so thankful Oikawa can read him because he doesn't perceive it in a bad way.

"I know you haven't settled on a university yet, but I know you've been considering Tokyo." It's true. It's also true that it may have been influenced by the fact Hajime knows Oikawa is going to be there. "We could live together. Somewhere between our schools, I don't know, but we would make it work. I love you. Not like… _that_, yet, but I'm definitely getting there. And I feel like maybe you are too, because it feels like we were made for each other. Meant to be. All that cheesy shit."

"Are you… Are you asking me to…" Hajime's still too afraid to say it, despite all the signs, despite Oikawa basically spelling it out for him.

"Hajime, will you be my life partner?"

And this should scare Hajime even more, the fact that Oikawa makes it sound like this, if he agrees, is going to be a forever thing, that he will have no out. But it doesn't. In fact, it calms Hajime instantaneously, fills him with stability, and grounds him.

After Hajime relaxes Oikawa visibly becomes less nervous too, but he still has that look on his face like he might be constipated. Hajime decides to put him at ease once and for all, stepping close, carefully looping his arms around his neck.

"Yes, Tooru, yes."

He breaks eye contact to glance down at Oikawa's lips. Then, he flicks his attention back up, sees Oikawa's intense gaze, and when his mouth falls open, Hajime moves in.

Their first kiss doesn't last more than a few seconds. They're in public, and they don't want to start something they won't be able to continue.

Hajime knows how fast-paced life is. He knows that in the blink of an eye, anything can happen.

But here's the thing.

It doesn't always feel like that.

Sometimes, in moments like these, everything happens in slow motion.

As he closes his eyelids, as his lips and Oikawa's make first contact, as he feels the glide of Oikawa's tongue, as he wraps his arms tighter, pulling Oikawa closer to him… It's all so drawn out.

He feels like an eternity has passed during those mere instants, and yet, he couldn't have asked for it to last longer.

Hajime learns something new today. Actually, he learns three things.

Number one: the face Oikawa makes when he's frustrated, and the tone of Oikawa's voice when he's impatient, is _really _adorable.

Number two: Oikawa, the bastard, when he wants, can run _really_ fast, and can do so while maintaining a _really_ tight grip.

Number three: not everything that happens in slow motion is bad. In fact, they can be _really _good.


End file.
